Jets, flying with no pilot
through the vacant sky
no direction
just heading for a place
looking for a home
with no traps that come up and stab you blind
no landmines hidden at every step
no endless record, not letting you forget
the lashings the mind trips the loveless times
Taking over the controls
steer it back off course
to places with no identity
no photos and no clothes
an endless fashion show
a wardrobe from which to choose
my life, my dreams, my goals.
A spacious machine to fill with love
friends once faces along the road
souls that change us grow us
from hills we grow mountains
waterfalls from fountains
new flesh to mend the scars of old.
Monday, January 23, 2012
Monday, January 16, 2012
Concrete City
The lights, flash bright above around me
run me to the ground see?
hollow steps concrete beneath
the city's soul can't find the beat
cause I'm tied in layers of today
trying to break free, leave, go play
body in sand, head staring at the sea
diving in swimming endlessly
in underwater rainbows and dolphin carresses
weaving through coral like they're fancy head dresses
on the runway through one day suspended in time
an endless universe where everyone's flying
through the spells of love so fresh its wet
snapping each moment so we don't forget
in our heads, in our souls, when we get back in the rhythm
of the fast and furious urban condition
to remember that sea has a beat of its own
there's more to it than what we've been shown
on flashing billboards at breakneck speeds
Some love and tenderness is all she needs
And maybe a little pause here and there
and endless rhythm let down our hair
beatboxing, tapstomping, electric pirouettes
spinning, breaking, dubmatching sets
If the city can't be silent then let it sing
the incessant pulse of its dynamic rhythm.
Worldbeat hit the street, the ancient drum that makes us one
On the blacktop or the sand, African Desert or Disneyland
There's a wallstreet buzz in every concrete space
But the earth is the home where it all takes place.
run me to the ground see?
hollow steps concrete beneath
the city's soul can't find the beat
cause I'm tied in layers of today
trying to break free, leave, go play
body in sand, head staring at the sea
diving in swimming endlessly
in underwater rainbows and dolphin carresses
weaving through coral like they're fancy head dresses
on the runway through one day suspended in time
an endless universe where everyone's flying
through the spells of love so fresh its wet
snapping each moment so we don't forget
in our heads, in our souls, when we get back in the rhythm
of the fast and furious urban condition
to remember that sea has a beat of its own
there's more to it than what we've been shown
on flashing billboards at breakneck speeds
Some love and tenderness is all she needs
And maybe a little pause here and there
and endless rhythm let down our hair
beatboxing, tapstomping, electric pirouettes
spinning, breaking, dubmatching sets
If the city can't be silent then let it sing
the incessant pulse of its dynamic rhythm.
Worldbeat hit the street, the ancient drum that makes us one
On the blacktop or the sand, African Desert or Disneyland
There's a wallstreet buzz in every concrete space
But the earth is the home where it all takes place.
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Beginnings aka Subsequent Torment of the Elated Soul
You, who I greet with a kiss
a virtual stranger at my feet
whose auburn eyes melt shyness
from my soul
Send me spinning with that call
You, who captured an eternity of
detail from those 15 minutes,
the Chinese eyes when I smile,
the curve in my back,
the ephemeral cakes of my being-
I bit into you with biodiesel.
You, who called me after a horrid day,
worn out by tension and disarray
We walked into sunshine with every word
Our open flow relatively absurd
for strangers 3 days past.
You, Adonis pose in earth-toned
clothes and sweetest scent
I descent and greet with embrace intense- replayed
Bathe me in gentle cheekbone kisses,
caution me to share our meal in whispers
I'm offered a job in your midst.
You, back in your lair,
share 4 year old portuguese wine
Thick as sap oozes from ancient trees
Drawn by our endless talks
kept away from our tempting touch
Yes, I swam through laughter and tears
from each moment intese
You, cautioning femme fatale in your life
you don't like,
all the while sharing the nature
of our first encounter
lays it all out there
"We made it look so easy,
in front of other people"-
confusing contradictions marked by fear?
You, nerves afflutter as we drove,
offered me to drive your beakon
contradict my heart's delight
We danced like waves' eternal flow,
seamless undulating movement
like breathing the same breath
And then next day's call
Had I imagined it all?
An ocean moved between us
and I could barely hear you.
Had I given too much too soon?
Is that all you desired?
"We'll be in touch"- those ephemeral words
(often mean the reverse)
I opened into trust
and now I wait
I trust
I smile in delay
and move on with my day
long to stay locked in your embrace
"I love the way you greet me" replay.
Sweetie
by name.
Staying open and moving slowly
all the same.
a virtual stranger at my feet
whose auburn eyes melt shyness
from my soul
Send me spinning with that call
You, who captured an eternity of
detail from those 15 minutes,
the Chinese eyes when I smile,
the curve in my back,
the ephemeral cakes of my being-
I bit into you with biodiesel.
You, who called me after a horrid day,
worn out by tension and disarray
We walked into sunshine with every word
Our open flow relatively absurd
for strangers 3 days past.
You, Adonis pose in earth-toned
clothes and sweetest scent
I descent and greet with embrace intense- replayed
Bathe me in gentle cheekbone kisses,
caution me to share our meal in whispers
I'm offered a job in your midst.
You, back in your lair,
share 4 year old portuguese wine
Thick as sap oozes from ancient trees
Drawn by our endless talks
kept away from our tempting touch
Yes, I swam through laughter and tears
from each moment intese
You, cautioning femme fatale in your life
you don't like,
all the while sharing the nature
of our first encounter
lays it all out there
"We made it look so easy,
in front of other people"-
confusing contradictions marked by fear?
You, nerves afflutter as we drove,
offered me to drive your beakon
contradict my heart's delight
We danced like waves' eternal flow,
seamless undulating movement
like breathing the same breath
And then next day's call
Had I imagined it all?
An ocean moved between us
and I could barely hear you.
Had I given too much too soon?
Is that all you desired?
"We'll be in touch"- those ephemeral words
(often mean the reverse)
I opened into trust
and now I wait
I trust
I smile in delay
and move on with my day
long to stay locked in your embrace
"I love the way you greet me" replay.
Sweetie
by name.
Staying open and moving slowly
all the same.
Sunday, January 8, 2012
Deception
How you can play a heart like that
To manipulate so deep
To hate, permeate, seep
Into my soul like a virus gone wild
Was there any truth? Were you playing me the whole while?
Our thoughts, our flesh, magnets intermeshed
Slow down we’d say but our bodies couldn’t get away
From our constant rhythm moving in time
Sexual tension mounting sublime
The instant connection, mental perfection
Rapping together street prose insane
Then switching up styles to intellectually profane
Every language was the same, our voice, our bodies, our minds, and our dance
We made it look so easy, the deepest romance
If I’d known that night was our last chance
I’d have made a permanent mark
Put you in a lover’s trance
A curse you couldn’t escape
Deception you couldn’t place
‘cause you’d be weighing all your words against
Your actions so absurd
And you’d avoid me getting hurt
You’d feel a love you couldn’t cure
Then maybe I’d have been the one to walk away
The one to turn the ringer off
Like you’re a game I want to play
And throw you off your course
The racing horse out up ahead
Until you’re limping through each waking moment
Going through the motions of living
Fighting the regret from winning
From taking memories of time together
And wiping them away forever
But that’s not possible anyhow
I can’t lose sight of what we had now
Cause they say what’s so great, what will elevate
Can equally crash, explode, deflate
The greatest highs bring the deepest lows
I’d rather live them than never have known.
I just hope your heart chases you a little bit, gnaws at your conscience
And compels you to sit,
To reflect on the pain you’ve brought me through deception
and the love we could have had
The two of us together brought attention
To a magnetism raw that
Distracted us from flaws
From the grey realm where I rolled
Between the crimes of which you spoke and the family you revered
The biodiesel dreams you had and soulless jobs to which you steered
You lost your soul (your self) along the way, sucked into the blackest hole
I kept hoping I could bring you back without the journey taking its tollBut I became a casualty of the war inside your soul
And now I’d be so lucky if at some point
I come back whole
From this deception, the masks you wore to hide
The sadistic torment, your sociopathic drive
Even if your love was true it was hard to stay alive
In the battle that was you.
Can anyone survive?
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Piercing
This is a poem that has been etched in my memory since its inception, years ago, when I was experiencing an abundance of emotion over my father's terminal illness at the time. I nostalgically referred back to my childhood, hoping that the happy memories would outweigh the times I walked the journey alone, and this is what flowed out of me...
Piercing in my little head
wishing I'd been dead asleep
the rain that scattered on my brain
no slilent corpse could keep
Black lights luminate our tears
Flood lights radiate our cries
You're deceived by my quiet peace
Only 'cause you don't need to find
the silence that I keep behind
But the doctor kept me home all day
Lollipop and needle
Eat and play
Playing with my girlfriend's dog
On my seesaw in the yard
and muddy leaves my pillow
in the shade of innocence.
Piercing in my little head
wishing I'd been dead asleep
the rain that scattered on my brain
no slilent corpse could keep
Black lights luminate our tears
Flood lights radiate our cries
You're deceived by my quiet peace
Only 'cause you don't need to find
the silence that I keep behind
But the doctor kept me home all day
Lollipop and needle
Eat and play
Playing with my girlfriend's dog
On my seesaw in the yard
and muddy leaves my pillow
in the shade of innocence.
Fearless
Draggin me there, taking me with you
Where I long to be
But it’s frightening I see
to give myself completely
to throw myself into the game
will the life I built ever be the same
But is that what I want any way, every day?
Change is the place you can never stay
What we dream and what we fear each step along the way
Until the day we know its pointless
Look round, be grateful for all this
However big, however small
‘CAUSE ANYWAY WHAT Does it mean to really have it all?
All the world is at our feet
If we choose our steps so carefully
Free, fearlessly
See what life the world can be.
Watch my energy radiate and the inner peace sedate
The angry soul, the empty hole
Take the wheels in my control
Leading to the life I want to live
To let it flow, my wish to give
To live each moment honestly
To know each person completely
All the world is at our feet
If we choose our steps so carefully
Free, fearlessly
See what life the world can be.
The only thing that changes that
Is to take some time and greet
Each living soul that passes by
Stare in their eyes and just say hi
And don’t be afraid of what you’ll see
Some secrets, joys, perhaps some tears
What about those endless fears?
The unknown, the dark, uncertainty
Escape Unseen
From the endless refrain
‘What could have been’.
No denying the fact, there’s no looking back then.
Where I long to be
But it’s frightening I see
to give myself completely
to throw myself into the game
will the life I built ever be the same
But is that what I want any way, every day?
Change is the place you can never stay
What we dream and what we fear each step along the way
Until the day we know its pointless
Look round, be grateful for all this
However big, however small
‘CAUSE ANYWAY WHAT Does it mean to really have it all?
All of this for us to love
to care, to hold so tenderlyAll the world is at our feet
If we choose our steps so carefully
Free, fearlessly
See what life the world can be.
They say here she comes, here comes trouble
At least I turn some heads and got some people seeing doubleWatch my energy radiate and the inner peace sedate
The angry soul, the empty hole
Take the wheels in my control
Leading to the life I want to live
To let it flow, my wish to give
To live each moment honestly
To know each person completely
All of this for us to love
to care, to hold so tenderlyAll the world is at our feet
If we choose our steps so carefully
Free, fearlessly
See what life the world can be.
Why’s the Oxford list a ‘stranger’
For each brother sister we’ve yet to meet?The only thing that changes that
Is to take some time and greet
Each living soul that passes by
Stare in their eyes and just say hi
And don’t be afraid of what you’ll see
Some secrets, joys, perhaps some tears
What about those endless fears?
The unknown, the dark, uncertainty
We’ll unleash those chains
Like a Copperfield actEscape Unseen
From the endless refrain
‘What could have been’.
No denying the fact, there’s no looking back then.
Monday, January 2, 2012
A Journey Between Souls
This is a journey between two unsuspecting souls, a synchronistic, passionate, yet corrupt love experience without the beginning or the conclusion. The steps of this journey highlighted here take place over two months' time.
#2 Obey Me and I will Love You
Walking in the shadows
dancing sideways along the fence
we make the sweetest bedfellows
though our worlds just don't make sense
You live in places I've denied
Where honor knocks you in one punch
Lurking in my innocence you've spied
a world of tenderness and touch
The more you share the more I trust
rather than running away in flight
You a chrysalis, bliss morphing in lust
my nonjudgement shedding light (alt: my yield sign shedding light)
We meet in a place where dreams call our name
Visions awakened by fire in our souls
No sedative can this synergy tame
nor the thoughts of you safe when the clocktower tolls.
I will not bare fangs and roll back my eyes
nor the feelings inside will I bare in disguize
for as large as the lives we envision to live
So is the whole of what we have to give
I must trust that in sidelong strides you stay safe
As I walk into you while maintaining my space
In a life with dimensions best left untold
until we choose a life together growing old
Many lives, many layers, many places we've been
In the end, our one language is the space that's within.
#3 What's in a Second?
A blip
eternity in a moment
freeze-frame of blissful exchanges
A deep embrace
A sensual word
an enduring caress bathed in sweetness.
A bite
harsh bark of jealousy
expectations in time
A long, silent pause
A torturous wait
a moment gaining doubts in passing
A balance
timeless in a temporal world
undulating waves of intensity
An ecstatic evening
a fleeting exchange
a dance flowing in and out of days.
#4 "I told you, I know everything. I'm more mafia than you- you should be scared."
Click
Silence unfolds
Really, my words you just stole?
My heart bearing itself whole?
The wait
Untold meanings can be had
forever or but a calming pause
between our thoughts and our haunts
How can one know everything
and why am I not afraid?
I trust in you deeply and
at the same time I doubt
But maybe it's my doubt-
doubt in the worthiness of his love
of maintaining myself while giving
in the ephemeral moments,
here once, gone the next- in living.
#5
I give- hands stretched out
this gift laid bare for me to share
But do you want it?
Don't leave me hollow
with no give and take
Took years to rebuild this strength
that I wear.
Won't lose myself in an endless hole
dragging bits of happiness there
I'm a mover, too hard to sit
and a leader, I just won't follow
unless the steps together we make
the length, into time and places unknown
a world, a trip I'm lusting to share.
#6
Pick a straw off my back,
weighs a tonne I just can't hack
playing games, forgetting me
I need someone who I'm all they see
Don't text me a message with an IOU
Without your voice I can't tell what's true
Working late, out on a date
I've heard it before and won't take the bait
I may seem neurotic chasing you down
but I gotta speak up so it turns me around
to face you- the anger
to face you- the lies
to face you so I could lift the disguize
And see what is truly underneath that dark mask
not really caring 'bout the late work- I don't ask
But it's really the talking without any walking
to match all the words that you say you feel
Got me spinning in circles- a mouse caged in its wheel.
If we can't talk then there's simply no deal.
#7 The Surprise I had Waiting
Wine for me
Ale for you
Burts Bees to lather you up
My neglige upon which to sup
A glimpse of my artistic slant
A poem, a blessing, lover's rant
Isn't that enough to want
Yet I shouldn't even have to flaunt
I'm enough- my body and soul
But it takes contact to experience it whole.
Then dare I say it was your loss?
If it's true, then why am I the one bearing the cross?
I keep trusting against my own better sense
While I watch you constantly sit on the fence
Putting out your dreams only when we're near
The rest of the time we're casual like beer (don't like this line!)
What do you want from me?
Just let me know-
in this way I can decide
if I should stay or go.
'cause I don't want games.
I want love, friend, and trust
But if these things you can't give,
then leave you I must.
As much as I love all our moments so tender,
the openness, magic, and inner surrender
I need to know that it's all pure and true
Before I disappear into a fiction of you.
If we're pure and open it will last
and through these moments we'll have a blast
But I can't remain prisoner to your broken promises
Cause when they're broke then the trust vanishes.
And when there's no trust then
there's nothing at all,
and the house of cards we had fun to build
will simply collapse and fall.
#8
One last breath
clench my heart
shatters, scattered all around
Catch my soul
evaporates with every
drop of what I am
Now, a vacant corpse
a pallid ghost
passing shadows of myself along the way
trying to catch the sun's rays
that fed me through the storms
Through day and night there is no repose
my lids weigh heavy
once they close they stay forever
and I will find calm amid any weather.
#2 Obey Me and I will Love You
Walking in the shadows
dancing sideways along the fence
we make the sweetest bedfellows
though our worlds just don't make sense
You live in places I've denied
Where honor knocks you in one punch
Lurking in my innocence you've spied
a world of tenderness and touch
The more you share the more I trust
rather than running away in flight
You a chrysalis, bliss morphing in lust
my nonjudgement shedding light (alt: my yield sign shedding light)
We meet in a place where dreams call our name
Visions awakened by fire in our souls
No sedative can this synergy tame
nor the thoughts of you safe when the clocktower tolls.
I will not bare fangs and roll back my eyes
nor the feelings inside will I bare in disguize
for as large as the lives we envision to live
So is the whole of what we have to give
I must trust that in sidelong strides you stay safe
As I walk into you while maintaining my space
In a life with dimensions best left untold
until we choose a life together growing old
Many lives, many layers, many places we've been
In the end, our one language is the space that's within.
#3 What's in a Second?
A blip
eternity in a moment
freeze-frame of blissful exchanges
A deep embrace
A sensual word
an enduring caress bathed in sweetness.
A bite
harsh bark of jealousy
expectations in time
A long, silent pause
A torturous wait
a moment gaining doubts in passing
A balance
timeless in a temporal world
undulating waves of intensity
An ecstatic evening
a fleeting exchange
a dance flowing in and out of days.
#4 "I told you, I know everything. I'm more mafia than you- you should be scared."
Click
Silence unfolds
Really, my words you just stole?
My heart bearing itself whole?
The wait
Untold meanings can be had
forever or but a calming pause
between our thoughts and our haunts
How can one know everything
and why am I not afraid?
I trust in you deeply and
at the same time I doubt
But maybe it's my doubt-
doubt in the worthiness of his love
of maintaining myself while giving
in the ephemeral moments,
here once, gone the next- in living.
#5
I give- hands stretched out
this gift laid bare for me to share
But do you want it?
Don't leave me hollow
with no give and take
Took years to rebuild this strength
that I wear.
Won't lose myself in an endless hole
dragging bits of happiness there
I'm a mover, too hard to sit
and a leader, I just won't follow
unless the steps together we make
the length, into time and places unknown
a world, a trip I'm lusting to share.
#6
Pick a straw off my back,
weighs a tonne I just can't hack
playing games, forgetting me
I need someone who I'm all they see
Don't text me a message with an IOU
Without your voice I can't tell what's true
Working late, out on a date
I've heard it before and won't take the bait
I may seem neurotic chasing you down
but I gotta speak up so it turns me around
to face you- the anger
to face you- the lies
to face you so I could lift the disguize
And see what is truly underneath that dark mask
not really caring 'bout the late work- I don't ask
But it's really the talking without any walking
to match all the words that you say you feel
Got me spinning in circles- a mouse caged in its wheel.
If we can't talk then there's simply no deal.
#7 The Surprise I had Waiting
Wine for me
Ale for you
Burts Bees to lather you up
My neglige upon which to sup
A glimpse of my artistic slant
A poem, a blessing, lover's rant
Isn't that enough to want
Yet I shouldn't even have to flaunt
I'm enough- my body and soul
But it takes contact to experience it whole.
Then dare I say it was your loss?
If it's true, then why am I the one bearing the cross?
I keep trusting against my own better sense
While I watch you constantly sit on the fence
Putting out your dreams only when we're near
The rest of the time we're casual like beer (don't like this line!)
What do you want from me?
Just let me know-
in this way I can decide
if I should stay or go.
'cause I don't want games.
I want love, friend, and trust
But if these things you can't give,
then leave you I must.
As much as I love all our moments so tender,
the openness, magic, and inner surrender
I need to know that it's all pure and true
Before I disappear into a fiction of you.
If we're pure and open it will last
and through these moments we'll have a blast
But I can't remain prisoner to your broken promises
Cause when they're broke then the trust vanishes.
And when there's no trust then
there's nothing at all,
and the house of cards we had fun to build
will simply collapse and fall.
#8
One last breath
clench my heart
shatters, scattered all around
Catch my soul
evaporates with every
drop of what I am
Now, a vacant corpse
a pallid ghost
passing shadows of myself along the way
trying to catch the sun's rays
that fed me through the storms
Through day and night there is no repose
my lids weigh heavy
once they close they stay forever
and I will find calm amid any weather.
Moving On
It's time to start
It's time to live
Let the past slide
'cause we're about to give
our deep set focus
to our sweetest moments.
Let it go
the scars won't show
they'll just remind us where we've been
so when we start and smile again
we won't be tied to those same lies
or fall asleep to eternal cries
Yeah, I know, there ain't no high without the lows
but S & M shouldn't take the show
Joy, ecstasy, states that elevate me
I deserve it all, unleash my heart
let it roam free
I'll boomerang back and give deeply
'cause to live is to love
There's no other way (alt: every fleeting day)
I'll bear the scars that come from giving-
so long as you don't steal my heart away.
It's time to live
Let the past slide
'cause we're about to give
our deep set focus
to our sweetest moments.
Let it go
the scars won't show
they'll just remind us where we've been
so when we start and smile again
we won't be tied to those same lies
or fall asleep to eternal cries
Yeah, I know, there ain't no high without the lows
but S & M shouldn't take the show
Joy, ecstasy, states that elevate me
I deserve it all, unleash my heart
let it roam free
I'll boomerang back and give deeply
'cause to live is to love
There's no other way (alt: every fleeting day)
I'll bear the scars that come from giving-
so long as you don't steal my heart away.
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