Deception

Deception I’ve got no comprehension
How you can play a heart like that
To manipulate so deep
To hate, permeate, seep
Into my soul like  a virus gone wild
Was there any truth? Were you playing me the whole while?

Our thoughts, our flesh, magnets intermeshed
Slow down we’d say but our bodies couldn’t get away
From our constant rhythm moving in time
Sexual tension mounting sublime
The instant connection, mental perfection
Rapping together street prose insane
Then switching up styles to intellectually profane
Every language was the same, our voice, our bodies, our minds, and our dance
We made it look so easy, the deepest romance

If I’d known that night was our last chance
I’d have made a permanent mark
Put you in a lover’s trance
A curse you couldn’t escape
Deception you couldn’t place
‘cause you’d be weighing all your words against
Your actions so absurd
And you’d avoid me getting hurt
You’d feel a love you couldn’t cure

Then maybe I’d have been the one to walk away
The one to turn the ringer off
Like you’re a game I want to play
And throw you off your course
The  racing horse out up ahead
Until you’re limping through each waking moment
Going through the motions of living
Fighting the regret from winning
From taking memories of time together
And wiping them away forever

But that’s not possible anyhow
I can’t lose sight of what we had now
Cause they say what’s so great, what will elevate
Can equally crash, explode, deflate
The greatest highs bring the deepest lows
I’d rather live them than never have known.

I just hope your heart chases you a little bit, gnaws at your conscience
And compels you to sit,
To reflect on the pain you’ve brought me through deception
and the love we could have had
The two of us together brought attention
To  a magnetism raw that
Distracted us from flaws
From the grey realm where I rolled
Between the crimes of which you spoke and the family you revered
The  biodiesel dreams you had and soulless jobs to which you steered

You lost your soul (your self) along the way, sucked into the blackest hole

I kept hoping I could bring you back without the journey taking its toll
But I became a casualty of the war inside your soul
And now I’d be so lucky if at some point
I come back whole
From this deception, the masks you wore to hide
The sadistic torment, your sociopathic drive
Even if your love was true  it was hard to stay alive
In the battle that was you.
Can anyone survive?